As a young person, navigating the complex world of relationships, identity, and intimacy can be overwhelming. Not only are you dealing with self-discovery within the unchartered waters of adulthood, but you are also coming to terms with who you are sexually and how to best take care of yourself while embarking on a sexual journey. Sexual health is a vital aspect of overall well-being, and it is essential to have accurate information and resources to make decisions aligned with the person you are and who you are being.
Understanding sexual health – We are living in times where physical sexual health is taught in schools to children as young as ten years old. Conversating about puberty, childbirth and sexually transmitted diseases (STIs) is no longer taboo, yet youth still contract STIs or go through teenage pregnancies. Are we just ignorant of the facts, or are we of the notion that “it won’t happen to me”? Taking precautions is not only responsible, but expresses a deep love and care for yourself and your partner. Some think condoms reduce pleasure or are unnecessary. Many people mention how condoms are impersonal or confirm promiscuity. While we all have our opinions and experience intimacy differently, STIs and unplanned/unwanted pregnancies are a fact and using protection can lower the chances of both by 85%.
Self-Awareness in Intimacy: A Crucial Foundation – Being self-aware is a crucial foundation in any aspect of life as it allows you to navigate relationship boundaries, and emotional connections; and develop healthy intimacy habits. Understanding yourself enables you to decline any advances that do not align with who you are, and ensures that you do not find yourself feeling pressured or coerced to be intimate when you have no desire to do so. You are able to clearly communicate your intimacy needs and wants. Though this may be daunting, it is essential for a fulfilling, safe, and pleasurable intimate experience. As important as communication with a partner is, it is just as important to have conversations with yourself. Intimacy is essentially allowing someone into the deepest spaces of your being, and you have to be emotionally, physically and spiritually ready to do so. Being connected with and respecting yourself is definitely a big part of sexual health. It is said that it makes you more desirable to the opposite sex, and develops a growth mentality versus seeking just physical pleasure.
Overcoming Barriers – As a young person, navigating intimacy can be challenging. Various barriers can hinder your ability to form meaningful connections with others. Amongst many obstacles, the fear of rejection can be considered one of the “big guns”. Feeling unwanted, unworthy, unattractive and not good enough may make one detached and unable to cope in social settings. You may feel the desire to forge relationships, but sometimes it feels like climbing a mountain. In current society, not everyone is willing to put in the time and effort to get to know you before expecting a relationship to become a physical one. The ripple effect is far greater than imaginable and rectifying this mentality will prove a little difficult if you do not put in the work. This results in low self-esteem, communication difficulties, unrealistic societal pressures and negative body images. It’s important that you understand that this period in your life has growing pains and it’s imperative to navigate through them with positivity. Being kind to yourself is always the perfect place to start while you are still discovering who you are. Practice self-compassion, and self-care; and seek support from trusted sources or professionals.
Nurturing Intellectual and Spiritual Dimensions in Intimacy – Sexual intimacy is not just a physical experience; it involves intellectual and spiritual dimensions that foster deeper understanding and connection with yourself and others. Minimising it to just a physical connection puts one at risk of letting in partners who seek only physical pleasure and nothing more. Part of intimacy is shared learning where you explore passions together, discuss values and spiritually; and align for a holistic emotional and physical experience.
As much as intimacy is physical and enjoyable, it comes with immense responsibility. The responsibility to keep you and your partner safe, to remain self-aware, to be cognizant of barriers that may be hindering your sexual growth, and to nurture your spirituality. As you navigate young adulthood, accessing accurate information, resources, and support is crucial. By prioritising sexual intelligence you can protect your physical health, foster emotional well-being, make informed decisions and build confidence for a health and happy life.
- By Londeka Msibi, SAAYC PR Assistant
